Humans are never satisfied

3 months later after my first posting now, I am working.

I am no longer the good hardworking and innocent girl that is hurrying from class to class.

After the exams, I took a short break. During that time, I'd felt so lethargic and useless. More like a parasite, good for nothing save for converting oxygen to carbon dioxide. Now that I'm working, I try not to be traumatised by the pending work to be cleared. Guess I should give myself some time. Afterall, I've only started working not too long ago (just 1 month back) and it takes time to be better and more efficient.

It's good to have a little working experience so one does not get cheated so easily. But at the moment, I'm feeling more than distressed. I worry about the files sitting pretty on my table waiting for me to clear them. I worry about work even when I'm at home. I wake up in the morning thinking of the uncleared work. I'll have a smile on my face if I can clear my work.

Someone wise once told me that "work can never be finished". I find it an undisputed truth. Yet, I still worry about that uncleared work. Kamisama, help me!

When I was having my break, before I started working, I felt that I would be more useful and productive working than lazing at home. Now that I'm working, I'm more stressed up and tired than ever before, than when I was studying.

Humans are funny creatures. They are never satisfied. If granted one wish, I'd wish for a perfect world. In response to my wish, the Man Upstairs would probably leave things as they are right now, leave humans to their own devices as it is they way now. For it is only when the world is imperfect that it is perfect. It is the only way humans can grow. We find perfection in an imperfect world. It is only when there is suffering that compassion can be seen. It is only when there is weakness that true strength and courage can surface.