Heartache/Heartbreak

What has 3 months done to me? What is 3 months? What is time when day passes into day and night fades into night? 3 months. Time loses meaning in the face of extremity-happiness and pain. 3 months. That's all it took to change my life.

How time has flown! In 3 months, apprehension changed to enjoyment and turned to love. In 3 months, an unconscious transformation was taking place within me. It was unexpected. Maybe subconsciously, I knew I was going to miss BJ. My reaction when I finally left BJ-I didn't expect that too. When I wanted to say my parting words to Sweet, I found that I couldn't speak. All I could do, all I did was to reach out to Sweet and caress Sweet like I did so often over the past days.

When X left me, she was crying. Yes, what has 3 months done to her (too)? 3 months-it is neither too long nor too short. When I was going to leave BJ, when I felt that I was going to leave X not knowing when I'd next to see her again, that I was only starting to know X, alas! time was not on my side. I did not want to leave. Yes, there wouldn't be that kind of intense bonding that I shared with X when X was around me so often.

Big Gal said it's the quality of time that matters, not the quantity. Why then, do I wish for more time-to spend with Sweet, with X, with BJ? Why then, did I feel that time was running out for me when I'd to leave?

I wish I could've said something clever when X was crying. She said I made her cry. Sorry, X. I did not mean to make you cry. But you should know too that parting is such sweet sorrow not just for you alone.

As I desperately grabbed those last few private moments with X, I wished I could stay but I'd to leave. When I bade her goodbye for the final time, I knew deep down that had I stayed longer, my heart'd have been broken. Maybe it was good for me to leave when I did. However much I wanted to stay on. What X gave me can't be bought with money and because I was touched by X's effort, time and thoughts, I could not stop crying.

Sweet waits outside my door everyday now. I want so much to see X and Sweet again. I accept that some events/people in life only come into your life for a time but don't I even have a chance to let the good feelings remain for as long as possible? I must see X and Sweet again. I'm sorry I had to leave behind 一些值得珍惜，值得想念，值得疼的东西。I hope it won't be long before I see the things that are dear to me again. I hope I can see the things that are dear to me again. Otherwise, my heart'd break.