Understanding

Elan talked about knowing in her blog. Since my mind's on a similar track, I will talk about understanding.

Elan said in her "Knowing" entry, "There are some kinds of people in this world that I've made up my mind to avoid. They are the dismissive, judgemental kind of people who will summarise you up in one word or phrase without even realising what they just did was to minisculize one entire person -neurons, electrons atoms and soul -into one single molecule."

Maybe it's not easy to avoid those people, if you have to face them because of your circumstances and it's definitely not easy to avoid them especially if they are people you like. We, as humans, tend to judge and we do it all the time. That's why first impressions count because snap judgment counts. We fall prey to judging others and therein lies the problem: You think you know but you don't understand.

Yet, I think it fair for those who, in Elan's words, "sum up a person in one word". After some interaction and understanding, we usually form different opinions of a person, given the complex nature of humans. Most of the time, one dominant image of someone will come to mind each time we think of that person because that's the deepest impression we have of that person's character. Right, Elan? Perhaps it's not so much as summing up an entire someone but more of coming up with one adjective to describe your deepest impression of that person.

"To these ridiculous and clueless people who think they can sum up a person in one word , I can only draw my eyebrows together. I have no rebuttal for them, because if I were to speak I would not finish in one day. And I know that minds like theirs would fail to comprehend, because they lack the tendency to consider things from many angles and perspectives, simultaneously."

I can only agree with this. Like I said, you think you know but you don't understand. I've had well-meaning people trying to solve issues. Or rather, who think they are trying to help but who, in reality, have only a vague impression of the going-ons behind the scene. I try not to be harsh on them because they DO know something but it's not the entire picture and certainly barely enough to help AND, certainly enough to rankle me when they try to help with their limited understanding. I've also had others who know nuts who BARGE IN thinking they know EVERYTHING and judge. Like Elan, I can only narrow my eyes, draw my eyebrows together, turn the other way and walk away. I have nothing to say to them because like Elan, were I to speak, I will not be able to finish in one day. How can I sum up what happened in years in one sentence? I will not be doing justice to myself. How does one sum up time in a few seconds? It's not enough. Most of the time, even if you try to explain, they think they know but they don't understand because they're not in that situation and unless they've had a similar experience, their so-called understanding if any, is only scratching the surface of the matter.

Sometimes, it's not as what Elan said, "that minds like theirs would fail to comprehend, because they lack the tendency to consider things from many angles and perspectives, simultaneously." Granted, not everyone is so myopic though everyone is judgmental. Sometimes, minds like theirs fail to comprehend not because of the lack of their macroscopic view but because these people lack the understanding of the entire situation in the first place. And so, they think they know but actually they don't understand.