Parental Love

In "Desperate Housewives 2", when Andrew got back at his Mum, Bree, Bree drove Andrew to the middle of nowhere, dumped him there with his bag of clothes and some money and told him to get a job himself. She'd essentially abandoned her son. Because she said she was not strong enough to take care of him.

Strangely, as I saw how Andrew initially pleaded with his Mum not to leave him, I felt for him. Looking critically at Andrew and his relationship with his Mum, rebellious as he was, Andrew was only a pitiable kid who had sought that understanding from his Mum, that motherly love which he could never get. Bree of course loved him in the best way she knew but that wasn't what he was looking for. Or rather, the way that she loved him was not the way that he wanted nor needed. So he rebelled. It's sad. In the end, she abandoned him. Much as Andrew disliked/hated his Mum, ultimately, he still pleaded with her not to leave him behind.

A tiger will never eat its cubs. I cannot exactly understand how parents can give up on their children. Even beasts seem to have more love than humans for their young. Some parents can't parent their kids well and the State has to do it for them. To a certain extent, these parents have failed. But it depends on the circumstances too. Like in Desperate Housewives 2, Caleb killed a girl because he was unstable. Betty had him locked up in the basement to save him from being taken away by the police and put in a mental institution. She was even going to kill him. Another form of parental love. One which I cannot comprehend.

Then there are parents who aren't parents at all. Biological parents maybe. But not parent parent. That is, the kind that showers love on his kids. Lance Armstrong is one good example. He never treated his biological Dad as his Dad. Can't blame him. His only family is his Mum who raised him single-handedly from a baby. I always feel that if one wants to have children, he/she should be prepared for the sacrifices and be prepared to be a good parent. Otherwise, don't have a kid.

On the other hand, there are also parents who aren't parents at all. A good example would be foster parents. Non-biological parents. These are people who (can) love you as their own child even though there are absolutely no blood ties. I find it hard to understand this kind of parental love.

Some parents try hard to be good parents but fall short. For instance, parents who work so hard that they don't spend quality time with their children who end up distancing from them. In another example, parents who are either too lax or too rigid in their parenting approch. It is indeed hard to strike the perfect balance to 要严,但也要带爱.

There are parents whose parental love come only in the form of harsh love. In Mitch Albom's "The Five People You Meet In Heaven", Eddie craved for his Dad's love since he was a boy. But the only love his Dad dealt him, was capable of giving him, was harsh love. Even then, in heaven, Eddie still coveted that fatherly love which he never had.

There are still great parents. Parents who do their utmost best to bring up their kids. To jaw-dropping extent by normal standards. Such is the greatness of parental love.